What is being a young mom? I hear and speak to people who definitely think a mom should be at a certain age, but I remember being a mom for the first time when I turned 33. This was not my choice nor was it my husband’s.
Sometimes we think planning to be pregnant is a special goal yet we might not even know who plans our future.
Yes for a Zimbabwean girl I was late, just the same as my age group right now will be asking “‘so when did you graduate? when did get your driver’s licence and when was your first child?”
Such cliche questions are difficult to answer when your first 22 years of your life was in Zimbabwe and then the second 20 years of your life is in Europe.
I had to start afresh with a lot of things. At that moment my age group in Zimbabwe was moving on. At that moment my age group in Europe was moving on.
May I be proud to tell you that if I look back I feel richer than ever?
Having lived in a resorted village in Zimbabwe, having lived in what they call high density surburb and lived in what they call low density surburb and now in Netherlands in defferent areas as well make me who I am now. I have seen it all.
Ndongoda kasadza neRudhe ne muchaha, kasadza kezviyo ne mahewu kana ndava nenyota munenge mandigona.
Sleep well my dearest friends ❤ , My daughter in this picture is now 11 years old
You can clearly see that this is one of the times I was stopping wearing trousers. After my first ceasarean I could not tolerate trousers anymore because they were no longer ergonomic enough for me. I was now looking for trousers that go beyong my pelvis area. These are the moments when I was fighting hard to make Mbereko udjustable to different sizes and healthy and medical situations.
Through breastfeeding I ate more and had still have too much hormones that were not helping me get rid of water. So I have been gaining weight for 10 years now.
I loved to wear trousers that were not stretchy. I loved my quality jeans without having to cover my butt.
I wore shirts and blouses inside whilst going to my work. But I am happy with dresses and skirts. Trousers still suit me, but they are mostly not comfortable and the most comfortable became the pregnant trousers only, because if their belt that felt comfortable when the ceasarean scar is still sensitive.
Underswears that could not touch my scar were also better that the thongs. I hope the clever fashion people are reading so to take this idea as usual to adjust their products because I can imagine more parents may be suffering from this feeling of incesuties whilst buying clothes.
I adjusted myself quickly after realising that it didnt work anymore. In those years families and a lot of Dutch people would give me advice to go on a diet. I just could not understand the whole idea of going on a diet whilst breastfeeding. Some would say to me, noo through breastfeeding you actually lose weight. And me and nature were like 🤦🏿♀️really?🤱🏿. Thats when you start to realize that we people are conditioned to judge from one sided stories and the researches based on one group of people.
Its high time we realize that we all react differently.
I became a case study of myself. Discovering why there were not yet researchers who ever thought a woman can continuously breastfeed for more than 10 years without taking medication and purely hormones and poor lifestyle would affect her negatively.
Let alone heavy menstrual cycles during breastfeeding and low iron and vitamine D.
The most irritating part was people knew how to advice me to think about me tostop breastfeeding because it was killing me … My breasts were too big, I could not fit into any bra. All the bras I found were not ergonomic for me. They didnt have breastfeeding bras wo i stopped using them and since i carried my babies I discovered enough. So I made mbereko fit women like me by then. Mbereko became a bra for women who were carrying the baby at the back to practice sport exercises called Babycarryworkout.